Why am i blogging?

haha seriously i have no idea. i shld be studying counseling. but think mkt1003 took my brains away. heh heh. don't ask me what i learnt for that module. studying theories is different from looking like i fit the marketeer role. i hate cramming stuff into my head.

i had a nightmare. dreamt that i accidentally said yes to being someone's gf. haha i term it nightmare cuz i woke up in fear. haha and its not because the guy v ugly or horrible thats why i was fearful. think its just the idea of being attached in itself. haha but thinkin of it now its quite silly. den again.. i always have weird nightmare like t-rex chasing after me (yes that nightmare is still vivid even though it happened when i was in pri 3). rofl. n yeah i broke off with the person in my nightmare but i still woke up in fear wondering if i got rid of the guy. hahahhaha so silly.

yes everyone.. so stop telling me to get attached. i shld tell this to my mom too. hahahahha she thinks that i'm an ugly ornament on the shelf. nobody wants. hahahhahaha

i miss the girls. wing is leaving for U.S. soon.



If it gets too tough studying, pls try this:

who knows, the information might just flow in through the night. =) haha yes so my dog is a wonderful counselor now. she has SECRET training. rofl.

Study hard everyone!

The stage of exhaustion.

I admit to that. i'm just sitting in my chair, staring at my desktop. with eyelids that feels so heavy. yet the hair is wet, the fan is blowing, the brain is stagnant. den the memory kicks in, ten thousand things on the list to be completed.

Thoughts are very very important, it affects ur emotions and behavior. this is the crux of cbt. also the part of how i live my life. everytime pessimism comes in, i always am able to combat it with optimistic thoughts. thats how harsh i am with myself. i even belief that i will be alive after sleep. and i insist that i am all the time. hahaha yeah. i know it sounds like i treat myself like a battery, and not ordinary one. but those RECHARGEABLE one. rofl.

yet its not so bad to be one.

so i am comfortable with using cbt on myself, yet i feel that i am manipulating when i am suppose to use it on another. the conflict. then again, sometimes it is necessary to apply. and d definition of manipulation will be questioned.

ten thousand things i wanted to blog abt. haha but my head is screaming ten million tiredness.

the exco been great so far! never work this well with a bunch before. i hope it goes on.. our fun and joy and laughters.... and .... ermz.. ok maybe not the long meetings even though i know its necessary. hahahha and even our busy life.. we complement somehow somewhat, and learn together. gain awareness, provide support. =) i'm glad we know each other better and better as the days go by. jia you all for exams!

social worker day is a blast! i love the dinner! haha so secondary sch but such beautiful memories. such bonding. n yes lazy me will wait for others to load photos! muahaha...

fun plus stress. weird combi eh. at least assignments are done, presentation is over. its time to look ahead, and put in a lot a lot of effort for my marathon. esp when the start haven been that good, that means i have to put in much more work. oh wells. only myself to blame. haha ambitious me.

yes and once again haunted by my limitation of my task centered mind. i do need to step out of being task centered. however, i'm human. i need time. yet i demand that i change. grr. such contradictions. "u need to IMPROVE. " ten thousand times i tell myself. being overwhlemed by stress and emotions blind me. overwhelm by goals also haunts. be aware... very aware.

I miss the girls.

I feel that i'm changing so fast i'm scaring myself. Pls, knock me awake if i'm straying. i know its tough being mule, but pls try. for sometimes i fear.

Envelop me u crocodile.