dissappointed?

actually not really cuz i know myself quite well.. and i know for jitterbugs standards i'm only a borderline case(thus my lack of confidence and nervousness). haha and i am so correct. but going for the audition allows me to realise that i should indeed improve myself on the jazz section the next time if i really want to audition again. haha

It was a great relief seeing Phoebe there! she made everything seem more comfortable. and i did make a new friend! haha it was an enriching experience. Phoebe and i concluded that we must begin to pay more attention during ms ho class and shanne is HIGHLY important! haha

i also learnt another thing, that is to know exactly where the location and to be early for such auditions. i was so late i did penalise myself a lot for the whole audition. Actually i was just on time but the number basis is the later u come, the earlier your numbers. so mine was 9. I so didnt have time to practise for every section but luckly got through the first cut. cuz after we learn our dance, we got sent in immediately to perform unlike the rest who had ample of time to practise since their numbers are later and goes up to 60+.

So those who got through only begin from 28. 1 to 27 noone got selected. and taadaa i got eliminated too. haha kinda expected. Phoebe didnt get through either and she was quite sad abt it. on the optimistic side, maybe luck just wasnt on my side/ not fated or that its to make sure i dont penalise my own time for studying A Levels. haha

So that means after a's i have to seek work, pay my own dance classes and do jazz.

Thanks rah for dropping by! u really surprised me! and really appreciated it! feelings that are beyond words. n monkey! sorry for waking u up so early in the morning! thanks for all the guidance or i think i will never make it to the dance studio. haha thanks!!

Tmr is the start of school. STUDY!!

some enriching experience.

Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible

Fun, funky, and a little bit euro. You love your summers to be full of style and sun!

What's Your Summer Ride?

Wow i'm so happy! cuz thats my favourit car too! n i watched herbie! i so love beetles esp if its a convertible! however i'm too poor to afford 1!

Confi-dance. so important and at this pt of it i'm lacking it. i so hate auditions. i might just screw up or something. staring at mtvs for a whole afternoon. oh well.. if i don't get in i can concentrate on studies and it just means i need to put in more hardwork for dance..

ok.. hope i dont get lost ard millenia walk tmr.

am i really suitable for dance? better to try than to regret right. i shall pluck up all my contracted courage, put down shyness and face it tml.

wish me luck. loads of it.

surprises!

my prelims indeed was surprising.. actually more shocking. lets c... i think there was more empty pages than anything else for both maths paper 1 and 2. and lit prac crit caught me by surprise with its depth and challenging lang. econs... i was so careless...

ooh n tml is mokey bdae! lemme say HAPPY BDAE! hope u enjoyed urself today! n monkey cafe is wow! good food! hope she like everything though there are some spoilt surprises! but fun all the same! haha

frankly, i have been bothered by the idea of dance audition. torn between the idea of regret and lack of confidence i guess. The no. of professional dancers out there seems so intimidating i'm doubting my dance ability, besides i'm not that good. furthermore, after the hair line fracture and ligament tear, it just means further deterioration for me. Think i really need to convince myself, make my way down to millenium walk instead of always backing out, overcome the fears. like they say i will never know if i dont try.

I know many of u are clueless to the dance issues, and i really appreciate that ur listen to my worries despite that. I do hope your will forgive me when i space out cause its a battle within. Thanks Rah for the special gift! i love it! And really appreciate your support and understanding all the time. "Trial = experience". Your encouragement will make me more determined to make sure i will not back out of it. Thanks..! =)

And marian! thanks for the lovely though super belated bdae present! Its really impressive!! one whole big piece of cross stitch and done so beautifully! maybe i'lll try to convert into a small tote bag etc when i'm free k! thanks!!!

Hoped jm had a fun bdae too though it is a simple meal! i'm sorry i cannot help u with the burden u carry but my mom is really anti hamsters, well... if its a dog that will be a different issue. haha cuz my mom thinks hamster looks like rats. haha sorry! take care of urself k!

ok i know i'm dead for prelims, n to make sure i wont feel such uncertainty for A's, i have decided to start studying. more bday surprises to come..! happy happy days amidst the study study mth.

mug mug mug.

Ho Boh? Tadang Tadang~!

haha that is hilarious. serene's bf greet her with that everytime he calls her lar.. it tickles me a lot. haha no sarcasm!!

ok prelims is killing me. more like... my grades. haha nothing much goes into my pathetic brain. so.. Econs Essay was eee-ritating. Maths P1 was eee-vil. Lit P1 was eee-www. Lit P3 was my laziness fault. and i can so predict the results of my distracted and heavy headed me.

and we did make good frenz with the coffee bean staff! haha n now i have a coffee bean card, as well as a big hole in my wallet. haha so its 1 more mth of coffee bean before i'm freed of a's.

but i do enjoy the times at coffee bean.. our regulars "priviledges", the fun like serene's bf "ho boh tadang tadang" + prank calls to wing n serene's bf telling that they won a yr of sanitary pads ( even if it was a huge failure but the laughs.. manz...) ooh as well as the chit chats and "AHHH HEADACHE! i can't concentrate!!!" haha... u know why.

and i do appreciate all our meaningful conversations. =)

haha and i'm tired but awake, waiting for my mom to return so i can tell her tml is JM birthday! n my main motive- to tell her that i'm eating dinner with jm+ rian+ yt tml! that reminds me.. i must not forget her pres. haha so its gonna be another whacky night. =)

anyway reminder for twin... WATCH NARUTO EP 151! and bleach rawks all the same. i think i'm gonna get loadsa anime and keep it to watch after a's. meanwhile..

CONCENTRATION.

i just watch mu ji shen dan.

great. they are so propagander-ing for govt. pre-marital courses for unsure couples, some embryo transplant for infertile mothers, treasuring the family blah blah blah...

haha but i think sometimes pple need to be propagander-ed. look at the amt of broken families ard.

nevertheless, i enjoyed the show. cuz... THE JAP GUYS LOOKS SO goooooooooooood! maybe its just me.. but seriously, he's.. WOW. ok lar.. TO ME! haha if an aquantaince who looks like this n is interested in me.. i'll actually give it a thought. heh heh heh. ok the superficial me. maybe its my hormones. hahahaha den again i'm just dreaming and wishing. no harm right?

anyway its only my 2nd time watching the show. and maybe i shld get back to reality. cuz i think all the passive smoking (at the coffee bean cuz we sat in the open and later, every1 seems to gather and pollute the beautiful air.) have killed my brain cells. or maybe its the over dosage of books and info.

however.. dra-Gons still rawks. =) dun ask me why i like them, i just do. its LOVE. hahaha ok i'm kidding. but its a young thing.. i'm facinated by how much pple's creativity can get when its dragons related. last time it was books, now its tv. *breathe fire* maybe thats y i actually enjoy barney, though sometimes it really stupefy me. fantasy is comforting to my brain!

so now i'm a "golden hrs" tv addict. i watched the dragon show on channel 8, den switch to "table for 3" on channel 5 for some hot babes and desire for pampering food, den to "villa wellness" to remind me that i shld diet and exercise.. n then "mu ji shen dan" which makes me appreciate my mom who prob went through 1 of the worst labour since i'm a problem baby who refuses to embrace the world. maybe i was too smart and knew what i was going to face, thus my reluctance in coming out. HaHaHa.

ok great. remind myself that i shld be buried in books.

yawnz. i need some slp first.

laundry..

then fantasy.

STUDY!

great. i'm here to remind myself everytime i'm at my blog to study.

was just wondering, imagine if the word "fuck" (sorry for the explicit word) is said in a seductive tone, as its literal meaning is suppose to be. i dont know but it seems quite sardonic-funny.

anyway let me just repeat, it irks me to hear a girl use that word. especially using it before words like "you" and "me". yes its a swearing word, but i believe girls have more creativity and intelligence to come up with better swearing words than that. (actually preferably not use any swearing words at all.) simply because the literal meaning of that significant word has the literal meaning of sex revolving around it. girls just lose out.

that does not mean i forbid people to use. It's your choice.

ok on a lighter tone, maybe not so light for me, i have decided to give the audition a try. So that means i have to put in double the effort in my studies and dance. to balance both together.

Thus, WHY AM I STILL HERE BLOGGING WHEN I SHOULD HAVE MY HEAD IN BOOKS! especially when there's like dozens, hundreds, million, billion of facts that i need to squeeze into my minute brain.

sigh. back to maths, lit and econs. the never ending analysis and information.

STUDY.

shld i...?

There is a dance audition for scholarship on 25th september. my prelims end on 21st. the A's starts on 8th november.

The audition is once a yr, every september. if i miss this, its another yr to wait for. but if i go for it, it takes a lot of time management, focus and commitments.

I cannot neglect my studies, but there is this flutter all over me at the mere thought of missing it.

I may not be good enough for the scholarship programme, i may be totally unprepared. besides its preferable to take at least jazz, ballet and hip hop classes before the audition. and i dont have the time to. after prelims its only 3 more days before the audition.

maybe i can just cope with the ballet section but jazz is something new and i'm a beginner for hip hop, furthermore a rusty beginner. and there is the freework section which will probably kill me. ARGh!

should i just go and try it? and worry after i get in?

but i fear. i hate being unprepared.

quandary.

guide me, pls.